Monday, December 31, 2007
I had to drive a mattress to The Girl’s parent’s house. I got the frame and box spring inside the car and put the mattress on top of the car. I anticipated a series of disasters ranging from marking up or ruining walls inside houses to having the mattress fly off my car. Uninterestingly, not only did everything go smoothly, The Girl’s dad was sleeping and I got everything in the basement without waking him up. My good fortune is nothing but trouble. I am for sure going to get the flu. You probably will too.
Where did Stephen Colbert go to college? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include one quote from Jon Stewart, one from Colbert, one from Steve Carell and one quote from When Harry Met Sally. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was the Indian Ocean.
Have an amazing New Years Eve. Really.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Where did Stephen Colbert go to college? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include one quote from Jon Stewart, one from Colbert, one from Steve Carell and one quote from When Harry Met Sally. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was the Indian Ocean.
Have an amazing New Years Eve. Really.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again, but life goes on.
-George Jung, Blow
What’s the third largest ocean? Today in an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include one Tupac quote, one quote from Thomas Jefferson and one from a John Cusak movie. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply. Really.
Yesterday’s answer was the Renaissance.
Have the best Sunday of your entire life.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
-George Jung, Blow
What’s the third largest ocean? Today in an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include one Tupac quote, one quote from Thomas Jefferson and one from a John Cusak movie. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply. Really.
Yesterday’s answer was the Renaissance.
Have the best Sunday of your entire life.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Saturday, December 29, 2007
The Girl and I went to dinner last night. I ordered some sort of salmon and they brought it with a yellow sauce on it that wasn’t mentioned on the menu. I can’t eat yellow sauce because almost everything makes me sick. Mostly because I’m slightly selective. As opposed to picky. I tried one bite and I was certain I was going to die if I had another. So, I told the waitress I was allergic to everything and asked for a new version without the sauce. Before the waitress could even reply The Girl announced that I wasn’t allergic. I felt exactly like Michael Corleone after he realized Fredo sold him out to Johnny Ola and Hyman Roth. The new salmon wasn’t even good and no one likes me. I hope the Patriots win tonight. That’s all.
According to my people, the Middle Ages was followed by what historical period? I know this question in vague but I missed it so I have to ask it. Less importantly, today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include two quotes from people not named Sandy and one quote from someone not named Al. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was the Cincinnati Bengals.
Have a pretty good Saturday.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw
Moosejaw.com
According to my people, the Middle Ages was followed by what historical period? I know this question in vague but I missed it so I have to ask it. Less importantly, today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include two quotes from people not named Sandy and one quote from someone not named Al. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was the Cincinnati Bengals.
Have a pretty good Saturday.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw
Moosejaw.com
Friday, December 28, 2007
The Girl thinks someone stole some outfits from our house. If anyone has seen some sort of glittery halter please feel free to drop it off anonymously at Moosejaw. There will be some Rolos and Starbursts waiting for you as a prize. Really, I don’t know if it was a glittery halter but something was taken that The Girl didn’t want taken. It was probably that person who banged on our door at 4am a couple years ago to tell us our sprinklers were on. Please note, it is likely that nothing was stolen but you’re always supposed to start some sort of Salem Witch Trials/ McCarthy hunt down when possible.
Paul Brown, who founded the Cleveland Browns, also founded what other NFL team? Founded. Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. Also, today is another auto-reply day. They’re predicting these ends pretty soon. My eyes are twitching because of all the real work. It’s awful.
Yesterday’s answer was Mitch Richmond.
Have the best Friday ever.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Paul Brown, who founded the Cleveland Browns, also founded what other NFL team? Founded. Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. Also, today is another auto-reply day. They’re predicting these ends pretty soon. My eyes are twitching because of all the real work. It’s awful.
Yesterday’s answer was Mitch Richmond.
Have the best Friday ever.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Thursday, December 27, 2007
This is important…I couldn’t decide between a flurry or vanilla cone at DQ last night so I got both. The vanilla cone was better.
She had worked both ends against the middle for so long, the middle decided to give up and go home.
-Nathan Muir, Spy Game
I’d like a giant refrigerator that crept along wall but didn’t need to be deep so you would never had to move anything around. The key is that it creeps.
I dropped the remote control on my toe this morning and it hurt for a moment and I thought how terrible it would be to get tortured.
Which NBA guard scored the most points in the 90’s? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. Today is yet another auto-reply. They will end soon but we’re still so crazy busy that I actually have to work. It’s the worst.
Yesterday’s answer was Death Valley.
Have an okay Thursday.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
She had worked both ends against the middle for so long, the middle decided to give up and go home.
-Nathan Muir, Spy Game
I’d like a giant refrigerator that crept along wall but didn’t need to be deep so you would never had to move anything around. The key is that it creeps.
I dropped the remote control on my toe this morning and it hurt for a moment and I thought how terrible it would be to get tortured.
Which NBA guard scored the most points in the 90’s? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. Today is yet another auto-reply. They will end soon but we’re still so crazy busy that I actually have to work. It’s the worst.
Yesterday’s answer was Death Valley.
Have an okay Thursday.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
The best part of yesterday was getting a pack of lifesavers with just the lifesavers that are sort of the white/yellow color. They may be pineapple flavor even though they don’t taste like pineapples. The Girl bought a bunch of packs and emptied them out and then put all the favorites in one pack. That’s love. Actually, none of that is true but it would have been pretty good if it was true. I hope your Christmas day was amazing and that today is even better. Really. Why not?
What’s the biggest national park in the US outside of Alaska? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer we’ll be including three quotes by people whose last names begins with the letter P. This type of auto-reply is traditionally a part of the day after Christmas. I’m sure you knew that though. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was PBS.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
What’s the biggest national park in the US outside of Alaska? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer we’ll be including three quotes by people whose last names begins with the letter P. This type of auto-reply is traditionally a part of the day after Christmas. I’m sure you knew that though. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was PBS.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
I hope everyone is having an amazing Christmas. As always, please enjoy my annual Christmas day poem…
Water isn’t see through anymore.
It is windowless.
So, let us tear down the status quoa and find a new one.
A worse one for most but better for our neighbors.
Even though they don’t like us.
Please feel free to use the poem as your own today. Really.
Sesame Street premiered on what station? Today is a special Christmas auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a special short story about a forgotten crane named Albert. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was The Louvre.
Have a really, really good Christmas which, in some countries, is even better than the amazing Christmas I mentioned earlier.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Water isn’t see through anymore.
It is windowless.
So, let us tear down the status quoa and find a new one.
A worse one for most but better for our neighbors.
Even though they don’t like us.
Please feel free to use the poem as your own today. Really.
Sesame Street premiered on what station? Today is a special Christmas auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a special short story about a forgotten crane named Albert. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was The Louvre.
Have a really, really good Christmas which, in some countries, is even better than the amazing Christmas I mentioned earlier.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Monday, December 24, 2007
Happiest Christmas Eve day ever. If you still need a present here are a few options…
What art museum is visited more than any other? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of every US state that begins with the letters B and Q. Additionally, by receiving the auto-reply today you’ll have an extra email in your InBox which you may need when comparing the number of emails you receive a day with your uncle Hugo tomorrow morning. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Guyana.
Have the best day before Christmas Monday ever.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
- Some office supplies from your house. Be sure to include a staple remover.
- Draw a picture of a giraffe on top on a giant toaster.
- A Moosejaw e-Gift Card. We’re giving away a Free $25 Gift Card with any $100 Gift Card. No really. We are.
- An Apple Gift Card.
- Do a sketch of the F4 key on your keyboard.
- Paint a picture of you being invisible inside a bank vault.
- Draw a picture of Cupid holding hands with an astronaut.
What art museum is visited more than any other? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of every US state that begins with the letters B and Q. Additionally, by receiving the auto-reply today you’ll have an extra email in your InBox which you may need when comparing the number of emails you receive a day with your uncle Hugo tomorrow morning. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Guyana.
Have the best day before Christmas Monday ever.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Sunday, December 23, 2007
We want to hurt no one. We're here for the bank's money, not your money. Your money is insured by the federal government, you're not gonna lose a dime. Think of your families, don't risk your life. Don't try and be a hero.
-Neil McCauley, Heat
Jonestown was located in what country? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of some decent prime numbers as well as all the brands of soap I can recall using. Obviously, this is important. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Joe Montana.
Have a fantastic rest of Sunday please.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
-Neil McCauley, Heat
Jonestown was located in what country? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of some decent prime numbers as well as all the brands of soap I can recall using. Obviously, this is important. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Joe Montana.
Have a fantastic rest of Sunday please.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Saturday, December 22, 2007
I went to the bookstore last night to get something for a human person. The line was so long there was no chance I was getting anything. So, I went to get a coffee and saw someone I know and then we both saw a pretty girl so we sat down and had a contest to see who she would look at first. We both lost. Not only did she not look she didn’t even come close to looking. I bet she had some sort of vision problem.
Oliver Stone wrote the movie Scarface. The name Tony Montana was inspired by what real life Stone favorite? I’m not sure I love the way that question sounds but I’m going with it anyway. Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include one quote from Scarface, one from Pacino and one from Katherine of Aragon. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Yankee Stadium.
Have the greatest Saturday in history.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Oliver Stone wrote the movie Scarface. The name Tony Montana was inspired by what real life Stone favorite? I’m not sure I love the way that question sounds but I’m going with it anyway. Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include one quote from Scarface, one from Pacino and one from Katherine of Aragon. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Yankee Stadium.
Have the greatest Saturday in history.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Friday, December 21, 2007
I don’t care whether the bed is made but I do like the sheets taut. However, I was thinking that perhaps I only care about the sheets being taut because it’s an obsession as opposed to me really caring about it from ye ol comfort standpoint. So, last night I tried not fixing the sheets and it was awful. It was like sleeping on a bed of shar pei’s. Fortunately, I broke two fingers playing Kill the Guy with the Ball on recess in fifth grade.
Notre Dame coach, Knute Rockne gave his super famous Win One For the Gipper speech in what stadium? Today is an auto-reply day. So sorry about it. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include two decent football quotes and one quote from Liza Minnelli. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was LeAnn Rimes.
Have an okay Friday.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Notre Dame coach, Knute Rockne gave his super famous Win One For the Gipper speech in what stadium? Today is an auto-reply day. So sorry about it. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include two decent football quotes and one quote from Liza Minnelli. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was LeAnn Rimes.
Have an okay Friday.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Thursday, December 20, 2007
• I saw a friend of mine reading the book Busting Vegas. He was about halfway through and I told him the book wasn’t that good and even if he likes it that it gets worse and he should stop reading it. He wasn’t all that happy about it but I still felt like I did the right thing.
• This section is here strictly to take up space during the holidays.
• This section is not meant to take up space.
Who was the youngest person to win a Grammy Award? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. Today is yet another auto-reply day. I want to apologize to Sarah B, Prince Caspian and December2, in particular, for all the auto-replies. I feel awful about it and no one likes me.
Yesterday’s answer was Rutherford B. Hayes. The wife was Lucy Ware Hayes.
Have the best Thursday of your life.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
• This section is here strictly to take up space during the holidays.
• This section is not meant to take up space.
Who was the youngest person to win a Grammy Award? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. Today is yet another auto-reply day. I want to apologize to Sarah B, Prince Caspian and December2, in particular, for all the auto-replies. I feel awful about it and no one likes me.
Yesterday’s answer was Rutherford B. Hayes. The wife was Lucy Ware Hayes.
Have the best Thursday of your life.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
• The Girl got some soap that is mentholy and super hot while you’re in the shower. Then, when you get out of the shower you’re freezing. It is so great that I think it is going to change my life. I’m going to try to shower at least eight times a day. Sorry about talking about the shower so much.
• My dinner last night was so spicy I couldn’t eat it.
• If someone tried to rob our house I would probably cry. Or, maybe I could throw the hot soap and spicy food on the robber like Brad Hamilton saving the day at the end of Fast Times. I will talk to my people about it right away.
• Thanks again for coming to boring city today.
The term First Lady was first used as a reference to this president’s wife…which president? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. It’s an auto-reply day…I want to apologize specifically to Murf and Bill N for all the auto-replies. We’re almost done. I feel a lot of love in the room today.
Yesterday’s answer was the Sudan.
Have an alright Wednesday.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
• My dinner last night was so spicy I couldn’t eat it.
• If someone tried to rob our house I would probably cry. Or, maybe I could throw the hot soap and spicy food on the robber like Brad Hamilton saving the day at the end of Fast Times. I will talk to my people about it right away.
• Thanks again for coming to boring city today.
The term First Lady was first used as a reference to this president’s wife…which president? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. It’s an auto-reply day…I want to apologize specifically to Murf and Bill N for all the auto-replies. We’re almost done. I feel a lot of love in the room today.
Yesterday’s answer was the Sudan.
Have an alright Wednesday.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
I drove with my mom for the first time since I got my license yesterday. She did a u-turn and everything. I also learned that her favorite ice cream is some Ben and Jerry’s flavor that is only available at a hospital in Detroit. So, she goes to the hospital regularly strictly for the ice cream. Very respectable.
What is the largest country (in area) that begins with the letter S? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. It’s another auto-reply day but it’s a really good one.
Yesterday’s answer was three…France, Spain and Italy.
Have the best Tuesday in history.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
What is the largest country (in area) that begins with the letter S? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. It’s another auto-reply day but it’s a really good one.
Yesterday’s answer was three…France, Spain and Italy.
Have the best Tuesday in history.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Monday, December 17, 2007
They said today is supposed to be the best day in the history of mail order. I humbly disagree and would like to note that in 1981, long before the internet, a little company called Gahopa sent 142 strips of bacon to a group of phone technicians in Duluth. That day, to me, will always remain mail order’s greatest day.
When you’re bored please make sure you sign up to win the Burton contest. Click I Already Signed Up to check it out.
In light of all of this, if you place an order today I’ll add 312 Moosejaw points to your account. Five seconds after you place your order email me with your order number and I’ll take care of the points. Today is an auto-reply day but I’ll still check every email and if you don’t hear back from me please assume I’m adding the points.
Among the top five most popular countries for tourists to visit how many are in Europe? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of every dentist in Toledo, Ohio as well as two quotes from a movie with sound. I actually might not get to the dentist thing in time. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Wendell Willkie.
Have a really good Monday.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
When you’re bored please make sure you sign up to win the Burton contest. Click I Already Signed Up to check it out.
In light of all of this, if you place an order today I’ll add 312 Moosejaw points to your account. Five seconds after you place your order email me with your order number and I’ll take care of the points. Today is an auto-reply day but I’ll still check every email and if you don’t hear back from me please assume I’m adding the points.
Among the top five most popular countries for tourists to visit how many are in Europe? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of every dentist in Toledo, Ohio as well as two quotes from a movie with sound. I actually might not get to the dentist thing in time. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Wendell Willkie.
Have a really good Monday.
Love the Madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Lasky: Has your father ever killed anyone?
Rusty: Just a dog. Oh and my Aunt Edna.
Clark: Hey you can't prove that Russ.
-Vacation
Who did FDR beat to become president a third time? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of the best ways to fight off a cold without saying the word ‘airplane’ as well as three quotes from people who are somewhat bald. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Cardiff.
Have the best Sunday ever.
Love the madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Rusty: Just a dog. Oh and my Aunt Edna.
Clark: Hey you can't prove that Russ.
-Vacation
Who did FDR beat to become president a third time? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of the best ways to fight off a cold without saying the word ‘airplane’ as well as three quotes from people who are somewhat bald. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Cardiff.
Have the best Sunday ever.
Love the madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Saturday, December 15, 2007
The lady eating dinner at the table next to The Girl and me last night was coughing so much I had to ask to move tables. I felt bad about it but it was out of my hands. There were no tables to move to so I suffered through it. I think the host had a table but preferred to see me suffer. I respect him more for it.
Someone spilled water on me at the coffee shop this morning.
The preceding little vignettes are all true. Vignettes.
What’s the largest city in Wales? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of everything I’m eating for lunch right now and one quote from Chaucer. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was The Chicago Tribune.
Have a decent Saturday.
Love the madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Someone spilled water on me at the coffee shop this morning.
The preceding little vignettes are all true. Vignettes.
What’s the largest city in Wales? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of everything I’m eating for lunch right now and one quote from Chaucer. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was The Chicago Tribune.
Have a decent Saturday.
Love the madness,
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Friday, December 14, 2007
I have been toying with a new obsession and I feel like I’ve had it enough days in a row that it is time to open up….Every morning I’ve been enjoying vanilla yogurt from Trader Joes with blueberries and granola mixed in. I’d give it a 10 and I predict it lasts another week. At that point, I hope to become obsessed with the low fat brown sugar cinnamon pop tarts again and have that last for the remainder of 2007. The low fat pop tarts actually taste better than the normal pop tarts. There happens to be no other snack that can boast about the low fat version actually tasting better. Also, cinnamon is nearly impossible to spell. ssb
According to my people, what newspaper was the first to mistakenly print ‘Dewey Defeats Truman’ in the 1948 election? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include the number of girls I’ve said the L word to and two quotes from people I’ve never seen in a bookstore. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.
Yesterday’s answer was Spain.
Have the best Friday ever.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
According to my people, what newspaper was the first to mistakenly print ‘Dewey Defeats Truman’ in the 1948 election? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include the number of girls I’ve said the L word to and two quotes from people I’ve never seen in a bookstore. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.
Yesterday’s answer was Spain.
Have the best Friday ever.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Thursday, December 13, 2007
- I played Hold ‘em last night. I lost pretty quickly and I’ve never had less fun playing but I was still the best player. I don’t think I was dealt a hand better than 9-2 and basically got blinded out. If you have no idea what any of this means please read Bringing Down the House. Bringing Down the House has nothing to do with poker but it has a great green cover that will look especially good near any charcoal grey book on your bookshelf.
- Ssb
- And, bullet point.
What country governed Guam before the US? Not sure if governed is the right word but I’m going with it. Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.
Yesterday’s answer was Bob Barker.
Have an okay Thursday please.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
- It’s not that I don’t like taking the garbage out; I can’t stand it. It ruins the entire week. I Googled this obsession and I can’t find anything.
- I put Q-tips in our Q-tip holder thing for the first time and it wasn’t so bad.
- I don’t like the word Q-tip. I can’t think of any word that begins with the letter Q that I’m all that fond of. Quasar is alright.
- If you want to make your day worse read this all again. It is terribly tedious.
According to a poll of human people what game show host is known to know the value of a dollar better than Congress? I don’t really get the question but, like yesterday, I missed it so I am forced to ask it. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the answer.
Yesterday’s answer was Russian.
Have the best Wednesday in history. Really.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
- I’m getting rave reviews for all the recent auto-replies. I’m thinking that I’ll start doing auto-replies during the day and sleep all day and then stay up all night working. Actually, that’s a stupid idea. I was just thinking about the best way to generate a nickname like The Owl or The Bat or Nocty.
- I think Drew Barrymore could take Cory Haim in a fight but it would be close.
- If you ever need any Arcteryx stuff now is the time. Check the home page if you’re bored.
What is the most-used language in the Ukraine? My hint is that I missed it and I am therefore forced to ask it… those are the rules but it’s not much of a hint I suppose. Think contrarian and then back again. I’m going to stop now…please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the answer.
Yesterday’s answer was Verizon.
Have a decent Tuesday.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Monday, December 10, 2007
Three years ago today I met a chipmunk named Leroy. Unlike, most chipmunks, Leroy doesn’t have a bad temper but he does wear shiny shoes and that’s why I’m pleased to announce that if you buy anything from Moosejaw today I’ll add 398 Moosejaw points to your account. Five seconds after you place your order please email me with your order number and I’ll take care of adding the points.
According to my people, what telecommunications company (think cell phones) spends more money on advertising than any other? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include my four favorite drinks and one quote from a movie that has a scene in a mine. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Also, even though it’s an auto-reply day I’ll still read all the emails and add all your points. If you don’t hear back from me please assume the Moosejaw points are a Go and they’ll show up no late than sundown tomorrow. Really, they’ll show up later today but I just like saying sundown.
Yesterday’s answer was zero.
Have the best Monday of your entire life.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
According to my people, what telecommunications company (think cell phones) spends more money on advertising than any other? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include my four favorite drinks and one quote from a movie that has a scene in a mine. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Also, even though it’s an auto-reply day I’ll still read all the emails and add all your points. If you don’t hear back from me please assume the Moosejaw points are a Go and they’ll show up no late than sundown tomorrow. Really, they’ll show up later today but I just like saying sundown.
Yesterday’s answer was zero.
Have the best Monday of your entire life.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Sunday, December 09, 2007
That rug really tied the room together.
-The Dude, The Big Lebowski
How many of the Top Ten Most Thrilling Movies, according to the American Film Institute, have been released since 2000? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include three quotes from movies that I think are super scary. Super scary. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was McCartney’s first solo album.
Have a decent Sunday please.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
-The Dude, The Big Lebowski
How many of the Top Ten Most Thrilling Movies, according to the American Film Institute, have been released since 2000? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include three quotes from movies that I think are super scary. Super scary. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was McCartney’s first solo album.
Have a decent Sunday please.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Saturday, December 08, 2007
Here’s a story about my jeans…I put on jeans this morning and they were really tight. I thought there was about a twenty percent chance that tight jeans were in style so I went with it and took the risk of perhaps being too sexy. About five minutes after I got to work the jeans ripped. Now I’m assuming there’s another ten percent chance that ripped jeans are cool. What’s the moral of the story you may ask? Well, to me, the story about my jeans made me think a lot about love. Why risk love when it is just going to be ripped away like a sailboat on a pedestal in Orlando? Why not just pretend to be something that you are not and live through life in complete denial like the Matrix?
Which came first, McCartney’s first solo album or the break-up of the Beatles? Today is auto-reply day. In addition to the answer today’s auto-reply will include a list of everything within a decimeter of my computer as I write the auto-reply. Needless to say, this is important. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was North Dakota.
Have the best Saturday ever.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Which came first, McCartney’s first solo album or the break-up of the Beatles? Today is auto-reply day. In addition to the answer today’s auto-reply will include a list of everything within a decimeter of my computer as I write the auto-reply. Needless to say, this is important. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was North Dakota.
Have the best Saturday ever.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Friday, December 07, 2007
• The remark today is extremely uninteresting. We’re recommending that you stop reading now. Really.
• Someone at Moosejaw is using the same bag for lunch as I am. It is a Starbucks to go bag. I checked the lunch and there is an apple and a big yellow spoon in it. I couldn’t check any further without it looking suspicious but I am positive this is all a part of some grandiose scheme to get rid of me. It’s been a decent life though so I’m okay with it.
• Bullet point.
Which state entered the US first…North Dakota or South Dakota? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of every letter in the alphabet aside from G and also the name of my dentist’s cat. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.comfor this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was New York.
Have an alright Friday.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
• Someone at Moosejaw is using the same bag for lunch as I am. It is a Starbucks to go bag. I checked the lunch and there is an apple and a big yellow spoon in it. I couldn’t check any further without it looking suspicious but I am positive this is all a part of some grandiose scheme to get rid of me. It’s been a decent life though so I’m okay with it.
• Bullet point.
Which state entered the US first…North Dakota or South Dakota? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of every letter in the alphabet aside from G and also the name of my dentist’s cat. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.comfor this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was New York.
Have an alright Friday.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Thursday, December 06, 2007
The Girl and I brought dinner to The Girl’s sister’s house last night. Instead of splitting the cost of the dinner we made a deal that we paid in exchange for The Girl’s sister singing We Are the World. And, it was a beautiful rendition. More importantly, I believe We Are the World can become a new form of commerce. I have a feeling that we are about to change everything.
President William McKinley was assassinated in what US state? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.
Yesterday’s answer was Gordie Howe.
Have the best Thursday ever.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
President William McKinley was assassinated in what US state? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.
Yesterday’s answer was Gordie Howe.
Have the best Thursday ever.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
The Moosejaw contest this month isn’t that good but you should consider checking it out if you have absolutely nothing better to do. Please click I Love My New Shoes to click through.
Also, in case you haven’t seen the Moosejaw catalog you should check it out and read every single line. Or don’t. Please click I Love Cranberry Sauce to check out the catalog online.
Section Three.
I’m wearing my hair in a bun this morning. I don’t know what that means but I just laughed.
What hockey player played more NHL games than any other? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.
Yesterday’s answer was Sinead O'Connor.
Have an okay Wednesday.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Also, in case you haven’t seen the Moosejaw catalog you should check it out and read every single line. Or don’t. Please click I Love Cranberry Sauce to check out the catalog online.
Section Three.
I’m wearing my hair in a bun this morning. I don’t know what that means but I just laughed.
What hockey player played more NHL games than any other? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.
Yesterday’s answer was Sinead O'Connor.
Have an okay Wednesday.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
_he lady who si_s abou_ seven sea_s from me has no _ on her keyboard. _his is _he firs_ _ime I have heard _his happening _o anyone excep_ for me. So, in honor of _he even_ I have excluded all _’s from _he remark _oday. I would normally recommend _ha_ you do _he same bu_ Groucho Marx said “I don'_ care _o belong _o a club _ha_ accep_s people like me as members” and I’m cer_ain he’s righ_. Bu_ I assume _ha_, because I _hink he’s righ_, you should probably disagree wi_h me. I_’s all abou_ being con_rarian.
Who is _he only ar_is_ _o ever refuse his or her Grammy? Please email your answer _o me a_ _rapper@moosejaw.com .
Yes_erday’s answer was China.
Have _he bes_ _uesday of your en_ire life.
Love _he madness.
_rapper
Moosejaw.com
Who is _he only ar_is_ _o ever refuse his or her Grammy? Please email your answer _o me a_ _rapper@moosejaw.com .
Yes_erday’s answer was China.
Have _he bes_ _uesday of your en_ire life.
Love _he madness.
_rapper
Moosejaw.com
Monday, December 03, 2007
- Emergency…if you haven’t entered the contest on our home page please check it out. Click here to see it. Just joking. Click this one. My analyst would have told me this remark not only represents my control issues but is a reflection that the apocalypse is upon us.
- Bullet point.
- Bullet point and section three.
According to the lady that sits near me, where was catsup discovered…China, Italy, US or France? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include a list of the best letters. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this important auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was 42.
Have an alright Monday. I’m thinking good but not great.
Love the Madness
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Sunday, December 02, 2007
At the Derek Zoolander Center For Children Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too, we teach you that there's more to life than being really, really good looking.
-Zoolander
How many different US Presidents have there been? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include three quotes from magicians and one quote from Fergie. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Providence, Rhode Island.
Have the best Sunday ever.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
-Zoolander
How many different US Presidents have there been? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include three quotes from magicians and one quote from Fergie. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Providence, Rhode Island.
Have the best Sunday ever.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Saturday, December 01, 2007
In honor of December I am not going to do the following today. This is important…
Use a towel.
Touch anyone’s nose.
Read about the history of coins.
Play any board game.
Drink chocolate milk with anyone who has been divorced.
Carry soap through a tunnel.
Perhaps you too can figure out a way that you can contribute to a better world.
Since its establishment in 1845 the US Naval Academy has been located at Annapolis, Maryland except for during the Civil War when it was moved to this city? Today is the first auto-reply day of December which is really, really good. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include three quotes from presidents who served in the military and one quote from Ann Boleyn. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this riveting auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Pittsburgh in 1903. Technically, the answer was just Pittsburgh.
Have an okay Saturday.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
Use a towel.
Touch anyone’s nose.
Read about the history of coins.
Play any board game.
Drink chocolate milk with anyone who has been divorced.
Carry soap through a tunnel.
Perhaps you too can figure out a way that you can contribute to a better world.
Since its establishment in 1845 the US Naval Academy has been located at Annapolis, Maryland except for during the Civil War when it was moved to this city? Today is the first auto-reply day of December which is really, really good. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include three quotes from presidents who served in the military and one quote from Ann Boleyn. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for this riveting auto-reply.
Yesterday’s answer was Pittsburgh in 1903. Technically, the answer was just Pittsburgh.
Have an okay Saturday.
Love the madness.
Trapper
Moosejaw.com
