Moosejaw Daily Madness

Yesterday's game was a battle. We won something like 13-10. Coach Indy almost got in about ten fights. I had a throwing error and slipped in the outfield. I don't think anyone saw me slip though.

Today is the last day of the contest. Because I am guessing at least twenty thousand people got all five questions right this week and that I'll be adding Moosejaw points all day long, today is an auto-reply day.

When you reply to the answer today please let me know if you got all the questions right this week. If you get the question right today and you got everything correct all week I'll add the points for you today.

I separated this section and the previous three sections into separate paragraphs because I feel like I've created a lot of bureaucracy today and the separate paragraphs seem more readable. Unsalted pretzels for everyone!

According to Forbes' 2005 list of Richest Americans how many in the top ten were Waltons as in Wall Mart Waltons? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was California. Florida was second.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

• Lots to tell today. Please check out the Moosejaw My Space page and do everything you’re supposed to do. Add friends, fix your hair, tell someone you love them, pretend you’re a giraffe and start carrying an extra mirror.


• If you get linked up to our My Space page and tell lots of friends about it please feel free to use coupon 13 to get 25% off any Trapper Tee. The code will work for today and tomorrow. If you have no interest in the My Space page you can still get the deal.


• Big softball game tonight. The team we’re playing was beating us last time in the last inning and we had to pull it out with some late game heroics. I predict I make four errors and go 1-4 at the plate.

In 2003, Americans visited what state more than any other? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday’s answer was 13...Ecuador, Colombia, Brazil, Sao Tome & Principe, Gabon, Republic of the Congo, Democratic Republic of the Congo, Uganda, Kenya, Somalia, Maldives, Indonesia and Kiribati.

Have the greatest Thursday ever.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

I like a peppermint patty but I don’t like chocolate. So, yesterday I bought mint and marshmallows at the grocery store with the intention of making my own chocolate-free mint. The girl and I did some melting, some mixing and some freezing. Easy.

I would say it ended up as the most vile piece of candy in the history of food. It only looked worse than it tasted. The effort was certainly there though. Who cares about effort? Please don’t answer that and sorry you had to read this.
How many countries does the equator pass through – 13, 15 or 17? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday’s answer was Indiana.

Have the greatest Wednesday in history. You might as well.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

• Please check out the new Moosejaw truck. I promise it is worth looking at. Sorry about ending a sentence with a preposition. Not that sorry though.


• Also, please make sure you know about the Daily Remark contest this week.


• Please play Eric Clapton's Lonely Stranger from Unplugged at my funeral.

In 2004, what Big Ten school raised the most money through fundraising? This is a tough one and could make all the difference whether or not you succeed in the contest. Perhaps that’s even a hint. Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday’s answer was Mexico.

Have the most incredible Tuesday ever.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

• For anyone who doubted that Sawyer from Lost wore a Moosejaw tee shirt on the show please check out this picture.


• Thanks to Richard for finding the picture.


• We are having a Daily Remark contest this week. The details will be out as soon as possible. For now, just get the question right and you'll be well on your way to winning. Sorry for sounding so brash and aloof.


• Please enjoy Relatively Boring Daily Remark Monday.

In what country did Che Guevara meet Fidel Castro? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was John C. Calhoun.

Have the best Monday of your life. Really, you might as well.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

Stanley Motss: The President will be a hero. He brought peace.
Conrad 'Connie' Brean: But there was never a war.
Stanley Motss: All the greater accomplishment.

-Wag the Dog

Who was the first US Vice President from a southern state? Please note, they said not to count Virginia as a southern state. Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer today's auto-reply will include three quotes from people whose names do not rhyme with rollerskate or cow. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.

Yesterday's answer was University of Michigan.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

Today’s guest remark comes from Cami who is definitely within the top five Daily Remarkers in the world. Here we go...

Dear Brenna:
Yesterday when I got home from work Angela and Carrie were cleaning the fish tank. I don't think they knew what they were doing. They tried to call you but you didn’t answer. All 3 goldfish are dead. I would like to take this opportunity to say that I didn’t have anything to do with the situation except making ginger ale and vanilla vodkas for everyone. Sorry about goldie, meadhead and the other one whose name I can’t remember but I don’t want to go look because they’re still dead in their tank and it's gross. If you think about it, they were kind of old for goldfish and probably lead rich, full lives. Willie Nelson, at this point, is still alive.
Again, so sorry about it.
Sincerely,
cami

Madonna trained as a dancer at what college? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer, today’s auto-reply will include three quotes from people who just have one name like Madonna but I won’t quote Madonna. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply and feel free to tell all your friends about this super exciting auto-reply day. Actually, you probably shouldn’t tell your friends.

Yesterday’s answer was a Joey.

Have an incredible Saturday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

• Thanks to Barb for sending the chocolates. You are the best! Everyone liked the dark chocolate with deep forest mist and the picture of the gorilla best. If you're not Barb perhaps you should consider sending us a prize too.


• The four people I work with most said their job would be better if I were alive instead of dead but only because they said they would have to work more if I were dead.


• I watched one scene in Footloose over ten times last night. The scene when the reverend gives his permission and blessing for the dance. When his speech ends and the Kenny Loggins kicks in...gets no better than that after a couple glasses of vino. Did I say that?


• We won our game last night. We are now 7-1. The game was well coached more than anything else. The media in Detroit are comparing Coach Indy to a young Sparky Anderson. I predict next week's game is sold out by 12pm today.


• I'm a martian.

What do people in Australia call baby kangaroos aside from baby kangaroos? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was 1783. The Treaty of Paris was signed with Britain that year.

Have an okay Friday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

• I am engaged! Just joking.


• I have never been in a fight but I was laid out at the Final Four in New Orleans in 1993. Do people still say laid out? I have friends who have friends who have friends who are forty.


• Softball tonight. I predict I go two for four, make three errors and get so mad about it that I ruin something for someone.


• I saw a funny commercial and planned on telling everyone about it but now I cannot remember what it was.


• Sorry that you are now dumber for having read all this. The main two rules at Moosejaw are No Yawning and No Sorries. Big deal.

Even though the US colonies declared independence July 4, 1775 in what year was independence officially achieved based on treaties being signed? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday’s answer was an exaltation.

Have an amazing Thursday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

The funniest thing happened to me last night….

After dinner I grabbed a cup of coffee and an ice cream. Picture it...one hot and one cold. All of the sudden my ice cream cone turned into a monster and started making threatening gestures at my cup of coffee. It was as if I was in a tornado with no place to go. It started to rain and I started to cry.

According to my people what is a group of larks called? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday’s answer was Million Dollar Baby.

Have an outstanding Wednesday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

June 20, 2006

I played softball with friends on Sunday. It was supposed to not be particularly competitive but it ended up being a battle. I wasn't as good at the plate as usual but it is because I hated all the bats. I couldn't make that excuse because I would have sounded like a baby and the equipment really shouldn't matter but it did and I feel like I won't be able to move on until I have gotten it out so now it's done. I still don't feel any better about anything and it certainly doesn't change the fact that my team lost 7-6. Please note, I still batted .750 but I didn't look all that good doing it. I would like you more if you liked me less after reading all this. Really.

What was the most recent movie to win Best Picture and also have someone from the movie win Best Actor or Best Actress? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was Queen Isabella of Spain.

Have an okay Tuesday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

June 19, 2006

• Yesterday the girl said the following to me. "Mute it. Mute your mouth."


• We have a bunch of new stuff on the Daily Remark that represents some lovely new technology. If you don't get what any of it means you're probably older than 32. Please note that I mean that as a compliment to everyone who gets it and to everyone who is old.


• You see that, young lady? Respect. Respect for one's elders gives character.
  -The Wolf, Pulp Fiction

Who was the first woman to appear on a US stamp? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was Florence.

Have the best Monday ever.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

June 18, 2006

What came first, the music or the misery? People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?

-Rob, High Fidelity

According to my people Mona Lisa has no eye brows because it was fashionable to shave your eye brows in this European city...what is the city? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer today’s auto-reply will include three quotes by people named John. Riveting. Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.

Yesterday's answer was 2004.

Have an incredible Sunday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

June 17, 2006

Another guest Daily Remark. This one comes from Larry in Dallas, Texas. Larry recently saw TO at a restaurant in Ft. Worth. TO was enjoying swordfish with a lemon ragout. Aside from the fact that this remark really is from Larry in Dallas I made that whole thing up.

A couple months ago I met my mom, dad and sister in New York for a weekend. My mom was really excited to see me at LaGuardia with a little suitcase for the weekend as well as all my dirty laundry from school. I didn’t realize it would be more difficult for her to handle it at a hotel in New York than home. She still got it done. Thanks mom.

I think that went really well.

Since 1986, what was the only year that a ‘non-performer’ was NOT inducted into the Rock and Rock Hall of Fame? A ‘non-performer’ is someone who doesn’t or didn’t perform. Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer today’s auto-reply will include three quotes that I don’t understand at all. Could there be anything more enticing than that? Please email me at Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.

Yesterday's answer was Brazil.

Have the best Saturday of your life.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 16, 2006

• I hurt my neck doing a dance outside our warehouse yesterday. I can only look straight ahead. Fortunately, I don't need to shepherd anything anytime soon.


• We won our game last night. We were up 25-1 at one point. I almost felt bad for the other team. I was the shortest shortstop on the field and I am allergic to cats.


• You know, if they didn't have the model train, they wouldn't have gotten the idea for the big trains. - Amber Cole, A Mighty Wind

What is the only nation to win soccer’s World Cup more than once since 1980? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday’s answer was Digital Subscriber Line.

Have an amazing Friday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 15, 2006

• Why hasn’t anyone made a cell phone with a little mirror on it? Or, perhaps a cell phone that rolls out into a full length mirror.
  
• Biggest softball game of the year tonight because we lost last week. I was going to guarantee a win but I realized that no one would care.
  
• My analyst told me the Daily Remark is just adding to my insecurities and that I should consider some solo time. I have no idea what that meant but I did win best smile in seventh grade.
  
• This remark isn’t that good…just plain old trying too hard.
  

What does DSL as in computer talk stand for? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday’s answer was Seattle. The Seattle Metropolitans won the Stanley Cup in 1917.

Have the greatest Thursday in history.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 14, 2006

This isn't quite a guest Daily Remark but a great Daily Remarker, who asked to remain anonymous to avoid being fired for spending her entire work day online instead of working, emailed a story that included the following quote which I like. Now, I've built it up so much that the quote cannot possible live up to expectations so I'm not going to tell it. Actually, I'll tell it tomorrow. Forget that. I could be dead tomorrow. Here it is.

"You can't worry too much about your hair when you're driving around in your convertible."

Very Marie Antoinette. I'm glad that's over with.

Friendly reminder about the 25% off the Men's and Women's Trapper Tees. I know at least three of you didn't get one. Enter coupon code 13 and you'll get the deal. Very subliminal, don't you think?

What was the first US city to win a Stanley Cup? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. This is another super tough question that I had to ask because the same person who challenged me yesterday challenged me again and I missed it again. Your hint is that the city doesn't have an NHL team right now but the city is home to an NBA, NFL and MLB squad.

Yesterday's answer was Peru. The train is the Peruvian Central Railway.

Have an amazing Wednesday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 13, 2006

Best day of the year and my life. The Men's and Women's Trapper tees are finally available. Place an order today or tomorrow and enter coupon code 13 and you'll get 25% off. Not 25% off everything...just the Trapper Tee. For 25% off you can use it as a rag and if they don't sell I'll be humiliated and probably get fired.

What country is home to the highest train in the world? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com. This is a tough question that I had to ask because I was certain I wouldn't miss it and I did when someone asked me the question. Here's a hint: the answer is not China or Canada or Italy. Did you buy the shirt yet?

Yesterday's answer was the Pyramids of Egypt.

Have an okay Tuesday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 12, 2006

• I heard the song ‘Always On Your Mind’ by Sheryl Crow and Sting yesterday and liked it. After hearing it once I decided to listen to it over and over again until I didn’t like it anymore.


• Entourage should be an hour.

Only one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World still exists. What is it? I’m not sure if I posed that question perfectly but please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com anyway.

Yesterday’s answer was New Orleans.

Have the best Monday ever.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 11, 2006

Pete: You miserable little snake! You stole from my kin!
Ulysses Everett McGill: Who was fixin' to betray us.
Pete: You didn't know that at the time.
Ulysses Everett McGill: So I borrowed it until I did know.
Pete: That don't make no sense!
Ulysses Everett McGill: Pete, it's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart.

-O Brother, Where Art Thou

According to my people the first opera house in the US was opened in what city? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer today’s auto-reply will include three quotes by bald people or mostly bald people. I know...riveting. Please email Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.

Yesterday’s answer was Alaska.

Have an incredible Sunday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 10, 2006

Another guest Daily Remark day. This is my favorite guest Daily Remark unless of course you are one of the people that also emailed a guest Daily Remark. In that case this is my second favorite after yours. This one comes from Jon in DC. Here we go...

Do you think toads get a bad rap because they seem so much less approachable than frogs or do you think toads like it that way because they can pretty much go about their business? Certainly something to think about when you’re blow drying your hair tomorrow morning.

I think that went really well.

According to my people only one US state has no sales tax, use tax or income tax on individuals. What is that state? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer today’s auto reply will include four quotes by people who are dead. Please email Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply..

Yesterday’s answer was Lyndon Johnson.

Have an excellent Saturday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 9, 2006

• The Houston, Texas Daily Remark Club has been shut down due to lack of attendance. If anyone from Houston wishes to attend the meetings in Dallas please meet up at baggage claim C at DFW 7pm every other Wednesday starting a week from this Wednesday.


• The Moosejaw softball team now has one loss.


• Third bullet point for everyone with ocd.

What US President made Father's Day an official national holiday? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was Ivan the Terrible.

Have an outstanding Friday. Really.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 8, 2006

• Most importantly, Happiest Birthday ever to Wendy in New York. Wendy recently finished her thesis on the philosophy of warm weather penguins and will actually be spending the rest of the summer celebrating her birthday. If you know Wendy please get her something really good and tangible. No card is necessary.


• Less importantly, I have to miss softball tonight. There's nothing worse. The person taking my spot at shortstop played shortstop at a division one college. If I lose my spot to him I will quit the team and quit my job and probably become a cabana boy.


• World Cup starts tomorrow. I was in Spain when David Beckham was traded to Madrid. No chance Beckham loses his spot when he misses a game but he's so handsome. Perhaps I'll get some botox before next Thursday.

Who was the first Czar in Russia? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was Africa.

Have the best Thursday ever.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 7, 2006

A customer emailed yesterday to tell me he just got a vasectomy. I thought that was a rather odd thing to tell someone.

Another customer emailed yesterday to tell me she almost got stung by a bee. I'm not sure how you almost get stung by a bee. If a bee lands on you and doesn't sting you does that count? I am contacting my people.

Please note that both customers approved this remark.

It would have been really great if the person who got the vasectomy also got stung by the bee. Actually, it would have been better if the girl who emailed was a bug veterinarian and gave the bee a vasectomy and then almost got stung.

Bill: What if you mix the mayonnaise in the can, WITH the tunafish? Or...hold it! Chuck! I got it! Take LIVE tuna fish, and FEED 'em mayonnaise! Oh this is great.
[speaks into tape recorder]
Bill: Call Starkist!
-Night Shift

What is the second biggest continent? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was Ursa Major or the Great Bear.

Have the greatest Wednesday in history.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 6, 2006

• The June contest is without questions the best contest ever. Please check it out and tell nine people about it when you’re bored.


• I was going to ask one of the people who runs Moosejaw.com a question and I asked her to guess what I was going to ask before I asked it and she said I bet you are going to ask something about your hair or your muscles.


• I was going to leave this as two bullet points but three seems more symmetric and comfortable for some reason.

The Big Dipper is part of what constellation? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was Wilson.

Have a really decent Tuesday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 5, 2006

A computer tech person came to Moosejaw yesterday to add drops for more computers. My dog was in the office and peed all over his pack. Inside and out. That was fun. Sorry for saying peed.

In Pulp Fiction what is the name of the boxer that Bruce Willis (Butch) was supposed to lose to? You can thank the Rhode Island Daily Remark Club for requesting a tough Pulp Fiction question. Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday’s answer was Paris.

Have the best Monday ever.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 4, 2006

I'm a superstitious man, and if some unlucky accident should befall Michael - if he is to be shot in the head by a police officer, or be found hung dead in a jail cell... or if he should be struck by a bolt of lightning - then I'm going to blame some of the people in this room; and then I do not forgive. But with said, I pledge - on the souls of my grandchildren - that I will not be the one to break the peace that we have made today.

- The Godfather

In Greek Mythology who killed Achilles? Today is an auto-reply day. In addition to the answer today's auto-reply will include three quotes by Aesop. This is not the Aesop of Aesop's Fables. Rather, it is my friend Aesop Grint. That's not true...it is the Aesop Fables' fellow. Please email Trapper@moosejaw.com for the auto-reply.

Yesterday’s answer was The Pianist.

Have an absolutely amazing Sunday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 3, 2006

Tough loss last night. Go Tigers.

Today is another guest remark day. Today's remark comes from Ron in Lexington, Kentucky. I'm guessing he plagiarized it from Faulkner. Here we go...

"My girlfriend buys all organic everything and it all spoils after about a minute. Many chemicals were invented for good reasons. I say spray everything. As you sometimes say...that's all."

As a side note, I think the guest remark went really well today. Sidenote is two words. I think it should be one word and I am fighting back.

What film most recently won the Palm D'Or Award in Cannes that was also nominated for Best Picture? Today is an auto reply day. In addition to today's answer the auto-reply will also include my favorite quotes by a late night host. I know...riveting. Please email Trapper@moosejaw.com to get the auto-reply.

Yesterday’s answer was Phil Mickelson.

Have the best Saturday of your life.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 2, 2006

• At least a thousand people emailed yesterday that I am indeed allowed to continue to write about softball so here we go. I'll try to keep it brief because of that one person from Meadville who hates me...


• We won yesterday and we're now 5-0.


• I hurt my leg and ankle and was thinking I'd get lots of sympathy and then our left fielder and center fielder slammed into each other going after a deep fly ball. Our left fielder, who also happens to be a kick ass triathlete, made a spectacular catch, dislocated his shoulder and went right to the hospital. The catch would have definitely been the Top Pick of the day on Sportcenter had the cameraman not been flirting with one of the spectators during the play. Left fielder's shoulder looked awful but he did get to wear a tank top and show off his physique to the girls.


• Most importantly, I can't even come close to complaining about my injury today. Maybe I'll break my leg next game.


• Why does it always have to be about you? I can't help myself. You have a sickness. I'll do a guest Daily Remark tomorrow. I bet you still make it about you. You're probably right. Lightly salted almonds for everyone!


• Go Pistons.

Who has won The Master's twice most recently? Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was Lucky Day or Steve Martin.

Have an okay Friday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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June 1, 2006

• Great win last night.


• The best part of Jeopardy is the fact that they get to the questions before a commercial. I wonder if I should put the question before my comments. Just joking. I'm way too self-centered for that.


• The food chain is totally underrated these days.


• Someone emailed that I am talking too much about softball on the Daily Remark. We're looking to go 5-0 tonight. I'll leave it at that. Thank you Meadville.

Which Three Amigo in the movie Three Amigos was the only Amigo to get shot? That's the first time I have ever used 'Amigo' three times in one sentence in the history of the Daily Remark. Please email your answer to me at Trapper@moosejaw.com.

Yesterday's answer was William Henry Harrison.

Have an amazing Thursday.

Love the madness.

Trapper
Moosejaw.com

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